Ever get a credit card application in the mail before?
So you have received a credit card application? You know what it says, but do know what it really means?
What it says: “You have demonstrated financial responsibility…”
What it means: You’re breathing!
What it says: “Our membership is difficult to obtain…”
What it means: Death row prisoners are not eligible… in most states!
What it says: “We have shortened the application process…”
What it means: “We need lots of new members fast or we’ll go out of business!”
What it says: “You have no predetermined credit limit…”
What it means: “We’re not worried, we employ the Break Your Legs collection agency.”
What it says: “Exceptional Customer Service…”
What it means: Except when you need it!
What it says: “Trained customer representatives await your call…”
What it means: “This is the part you talk into, and this is where you listen. Any questions?”
What it says: “To apply for membership, fill out this short form…”
What it means: You’ll get the long form later.
What it says: “You may direct us not to share this information with anyone else…”
What it means: “Catch us, if you can!”
What it says: “We look forward to receiving your completed application…”
What it means: “We baited the hook, let’s see if anyone bites!”
What it says: “You’ve been pre-approved…”
What it means: “You’ve been pre-approved to be Rejected!” or “We’ve already prepared your letter of denial.”
ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
nice one keepit up really funny
lol…thanks for the laugh!!
Hahahaha thats a good un
lol. keep them coming. star
Not too far from reality I think.
LOL, brilliant, star, thanks.
Keep them coming this way jake.
completely true…lol
Lol yes that is so true
lol this is funny
SOOO true Jake!!! LOL!! But when they barrage 19 yr-olds with good jobs who have just received their first credit card, with huge amounts of ‘ pre-approved’ credit card applications in the mail (like my son), wasting our trees, time & money (postal service, trash service, on and on..)
I taught him a little secret that I I will share with you all if you want to get back at them. All of those offers include a “no postage nececcary” envelope to return your ‘application’.
Go to a hardware store, such as H. Depot, and take the envelope & have them cut a piece of their heaviest plate steel the size of the envelope. This may cost you a few bucks, unless the worker has fathered your children, like in my case. Fill out the application with the most ridiculous information you can come up with, making sure to write “TAKE ME OFF YOUR MAILING LIST!” across the application as large as possible. Take the application & metal plate, enclose them in the “no-postage-needed” envelope and drop in your nearest mailbox!
These credit sharks will have to pay the postage when they receive this, and I guarantee you won’t be hearing from them again!! Have a great day!!!!
lololololol!!.well that sums it up with absolute accurate unbiased perspective!!=)
hehehehehe! That is sooo, sooo true! lolz!